The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count on our blessings. ~ Eric Hoffer
When is the last time you counted your blessings? I would bet a penny that it was either during a time of turmoil or great stress. The reason the arithmetic that Mr. Hoffer refers to is so difficult to master isn't because of its complexity but rather its lack of use. There are many things to be thankful for but when asked to name them we usually stall after the first obvious answers (family, health, job, etc…). I currently find myself counting my blessings. My journey with Wells Fargo will soon be coming to an end. Clearly the economy and climate of our industry plays a role but that's not the only reason. We as individuals also play a part in the fate of our future. As I count my blessings during what could easily be one of the most trying times of my professional career, I take comfort in the fact that my blessings were endless. Great new relationships, exciting new experiences, proof to myself that I'm not afraid to try something even if there is the possibility I could fail, exposure to great minds and personalities, and a year of resources that I otherwise wouldn’t have. My only disappointment is taking the time to count these blessings now rather than every day they were at my finger tips!
My challenge to you this week is to have a conversation about your blessings. Don't wait for a reason to have to the conversation, have it just because you can. You may uncover reminders to yourself that you should be more visible or be in contact more often with others. You might rediscover a hidden passion for a hobby or interest. Leaders are blessed with the ability to pause and give thanks for their teams not when times are good or bad but also every time in between. I've been blessed to be able to share a weekly message with you. I fully intend to continue doing so! :)
Alonzo Kelly
Senior Vice President Wells Fargo Funds Management Group
It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows. ~ EpictetusI remember reading a quote by someone that went something like this; By 20 do something, by 30 know something, by 40 have something and by 50 give something. This week I will celebrate my 35th birthday. According to the quote, I'm supposed to know something. I reflected on what I know this past weekend and here's what I came up with. First, I know that I don’t know as much as I thought. Second, I have too many friends that already know it all. Third, I know that the sun rises every morning. Finally, I know that moments of clarity are some of the most mind blowing experiences I've ever had. One such example of clarity involves reflecting on my professional success. I arrogantly believed that it was what I knew that was propelling my success and that it would be enough to sustain my development in the future. It turns out that it was actually my drive to understand the things I didn't know that was the wind behind my sails. The more I thought I knew, the more treacherous the professional development seas became. What an incredible moment of clarity! I suppose life experiences will do that for you if you just allow them to.
My challenge to you this week is to reflect on what's fueling your motor. Do you refill on the things you know or the things you don't? Do you believe that you already know all there is to know about your partner, your current role at work, or a subject you teach? Or are you willing to accept that there may be some things you've missed. Epictetus was on to something when he said its impossible for us to learn what we think we already know. Our friends and bosses have some colorful words for us during those times when its obvious to them that we don't know nearly all we think we do. Our staff or students also have choice labels for us during those times but with much more at stake. If your direct reports don't believe you have anything to learn from them, they will assume they don't need to effectively communicate with you in the future. I would advise not waiting 35 years to understand the consequences of that.
You never saw a fish on the wall with its mouth shut. ~ Sally Berger
Greetings fellow leaders! One of the hardest things to do, even when you're right, is keep your mouth shut. In some of my most recent 'spirited debates' with some friends, what kept the disagreement going was the fact that neither of us would stop talking for long enough to understand where the other person was coming from. Both of us had to be right and both of us needed to prove that the other was wrong. The problem was that being right and proving someone wrong is difficult to do at the same time. How can I prove you wrong on anything if I haven't listened to what you had to say? A simple debate about the shortest distance between two points could unnecessarily lead to something more serious. If I'm arguing that the answer is a straight line and he's arguing that it's not, I wouldn't care about his reason so long as he knows why I'm right and he's wrong. This is a classic example of not accepting the 3 levels of listening (hearing what you say, knowing what you mean, and KNOWING WHERE YOU'RE COMING FROM). If my friend is an astronomer, he will take exception to my answer because the shortest distance between two points is NOT a straight line in outer space. We've risked our friendship because neither of us would just shut up and listen and understand where the other is coming from. It is never enough to hear what someone says and think you know what they mean. You must also take the time to understand their point of reference. Leaders must become experts at this when strategizing or collaborating on projects. Where a person is coming from dictates their participation, their input, and the root of their suggestions. Perhaps we'll eliminate calling other peoples ideas stupid with this new approach.
My challenge to you this week is have a conversation with someone about something you already know about them. Take the time to be clear on where they are coming from with their likes or dislikes. Each of us has a friend that we know is afraid of public speaking, doesn't easily trust others, can't stand to watch science fiction movies, or hang out in large crowds. Rather than simply being proud that you know little facts about them, take your relationship to the next level and understand the root of preferences. You may have a friend that doesn't like attending the fireworks celebrations in July. Do you really know why or do you just assume to think its because of the hassle of parking and battling large crowds? I laughed when I first read this weeks quote until I really thought about it and realized its not so funny. Not one fish mounted on a wall got there because it kept its mouth shut. Perhaps the lesson of the mounted fish could be one of our greatest leadership gains.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com/
"Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word happy would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. It is far better to take things as they come along with patience and equanimity." ~Carl Jung
Life has a way of being both extremely challenging and unequivocally rewarding at the same time. Happiness is truly an internal emotion brought out by life experiences. No one person in this world can make someone happy unless that person chooses to be happy with themselves and their lives. Despite the wealth of many Americans in this country, the United States rates the highest among industrialized nations with people suffering from major depression according to a 2004 study conducted by Harvard Medical School. So while countries like Nigeria deal with hunger and Cuba deals with oppression, Americans often deal with materialism and a sense of entitlement fueled by runaway capitalism and the media who tells every American to spend, spend, spend even if you can not afford the items that you are buying.
My challenge to you is decide what is important in your own lives and the lives of your family. Find happiness in your health, your family, your friends and your community. Decide this year to give time rather than presents, a smile rather than a frown, or a hello to someone you do not normally speak with. Stop making your dark moments the focus of your life rather than the temporary problems they are that make your happiness so much more enjoyable in the end.
Nkozi Knight
Vice President B.C.C.
It's not till the tide rolls out that you can see who's been swimming naked. ~ Anonymous
This morning a very nice lady was stuck in her car while going up hill in our fresh snow. A few of us got out of our vehicles in traffic to help push her to safety. While pushing, I couldn't help but notice how nice the car was. I was confused that this vehicle couldn't make it up the small hill. It became clear that her tires were almost bald and no matter how cool the vehicle looked, without proper preparation for snow, this car wasn't going anywhere. I'm sure she knew that she needed new tires but figured she had more time to get them. The experience got me thinking about the quote for this week. Where in my life will I be left exposed if the tide suddenly rolls out? I remember being the back up quarterback in high school and not really paying attention to the plays since I never expected the starting quarterback to get hurt. When it actually happened I was confused and unprepared to lead my team when they needed me most. I also suspect that some leaders delay addressing important matters on their teams because times have been good and they don't want to upset the balance. Since you can't time or predict when times will turn sour, the risk of doing nothing to prepare clearly isn't worth it.
My challenge to you this week is to address something in your personal or professional life that you've been hiding under the tide. That is, commit to taking a step toward addressing a weakness you have before the world knows you have it all. Perhaps its an insecurity about public speaking or simply not understanding the numbers behind a budget item you are responsible for. There are many things that we as leaders hide behind because the system allows us to. A sign of your evolved leadership is being prepared for when the tide rolls out and knowing you've got it covered.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com/
This morning a very nice lady was stuck in her car while going up hill in our fresh snow. A few of us got out of our vehicles in traffic to help push her to safety. While pushing, I couldn't help but notice how nice the car was. I was confused that this vehicle couldn't make it up the small hill. It became clear that her tires were almost bald and no matter how cool the vehicle looked, without proper preparation for snow, this car wasn't going anywhere. I'm sure she knew that she needed new tires but figured she had more time to get them. The experience got me thinking about the quote for this week. Where in my life will I be left exposed if the tide suddenly rolls out? I remember being the back up quarterback in high school and not really paying attention to the plays since I never expected the starting quarterback to get hurt. When it actually happened I was confused and unprepared to lead my team when they needed me most. I also suspect that some leaders delay addressing important matters on their teams because times have been good and they don't want to upset the balance. Since you can't time or predict when times will turn sour, the risk of doing nothing to prepare clearly isn't worth it.
My challenge to you this week is to address something in your personal or professional life that you've been hiding under the tide. That is, commit to taking a step toward addressing a weakness you have before the world knows you have it all. Perhaps its an insecurity about public speaking or simply not understanding the numbers behind a budget item you are responsible for. There are many things that we as leaders hide behind because the system allows us to. A sign of your evolved leadership is being prepared for when the tide rolls out and knowing you've got it covered.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com/
In the world to come, I shall not be asked, "Why were you not Moses?" I shall be asked, "Why were you not Zusya?" ~ Rabbi Zusya
While I thoroughly enjoy sending lengthy messages about self accountability and self worth, this week is different. There is nothing I can say that wasn't already said in today's quote. While Rabbi Zusya refers to the 'world to come', I'm focusing on tomorrow. His message speaks for itself. No one will care why I didn't turn out to be like someone else if I didn't even live up to staying true to me.
My challenge to you this week is for you to simply be you. Don't spend money on gifts that don’t speak to your character and don't represent what you stand for. Don't try to impress your neighbors or colleagues by supporting a position that you personally don't believe in. Your students, patients, staff, or children are only impressed by the genuineness of you. Trying to be someone else only jeopardizes your integrity and leadership.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
While I thoroughly enjoy sending lengthy messages about self accountability and self worth, this week is different. There is nothing I can say that wasn't already said in today's quote. While Rabbi Zusya refers to the 'world to come', I'm focusing on tomorrow. His message speaks for itself. No one will care why I didn't turn out to be like someone else if I didn't even live up to staying true to me.
My challenge to you this week is for you to simply be you. Don't spend money on gifts that don’t speak to your character and don't represent what you stand for. Don't try to impress your neighbors or colleagues by supporting a position that you personally don't believe in. Your students, patients, staff, or children are only impressed by the genuineness of you. Trying to be someone else only jeopardizes your integrity and leadership.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
Communication
The colossal misunderstanding of our time is the assumption that insight will work with people who are unmotivated to change. Communication does not depend on syntax, or eloquence, or rhetoric, or articulation but on the emotional context in which the message is being heard. People can only hear you when they are moving toward you, and they are not likely to when your words are pursuing them. Even the choicest words lose their power when they are used to overpower. Attitudes are the real figures of speech. ~ Edwin H. Friedman
My apologies for the long quote this week but it was too important to cut out any words. This weekend my family decided to rescue a puppy (Copper) from the Humane Society. The dog was cute and cuddly until we got home and he decided to start marking his territory. Of course as we were telling it to stop, he was running away. For the next six hours, everytime we were showering the dog with love and praise he would run to us and respond with a wagging tail. Whenever he was doing something naughty he would run away. The decibel in our voice had no bearing on his attitude about staining our carpet. At bed time we asked our children to go and get ready for bed. It was an overwhelming moment of clarity for me to see my daughter, son, and puppy, all walking away when they were being asked to do something they simply didn't want to do. Why did it take a cute puppy and crap on my carpet for me to understand the simple lesson that Mr. Friedman shared? When words are pursuing the audience, no matter how eloquent or loud the tone, they will land on deaf ears. Once again, a lesson I've learned the hard way.
My challenge to you this week is to practice the art of communication without overpowering your audience. Create an environment where distractions are minimal and your delivery is calm and clear. Try not to have your words 'chasing' the team but rather greeting them. A simple test on whether or not your words are chasing the audience would be to count the number of times you have to repeat yourself on the same message. I woke up on Sunday morning believing the best communicators were world leaders and inspirational speakers. I went to bed wishing I had met Mr. Friedman and Copper 25 years ago.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
My apologies for the long quote this week but it was too important to cut out any words. This weekend my family decided to rescue a puppy (Copper) from the Humane Society. The dog was cute and cuddly until we got home and he decided to start marking his territory. Of course as we were telling it to stop, he was running away. For the next six hours, everytime we were showering the dog with love and praise he would run to us and respond with a wagging tail. Whenever he was doing something naughty he would run away. The decibel in our voice had no bearing on his attitude about staining our carpet. At bed time we asked our children to go and get ready for bed. It was an overwhelming moment of clarity for me to see my daughter, son, and puppy, all walking away when they were being asked to do something they simply didn't want to do. Why did it take a cute puppy and crap on my carpet for me to understand the simple lesson that Mr. Friedman shared? When words are pursuing the audience, no matter how eloquent or loud the tone, they will land on deaf ears. Once again, a lesson I've learned the hard way.
My challenge to you this week is to practice the art of communication without overpowering your audience. Create an environment where distractions are minimal and your delivery is calm and clear. Try not to have your words 'chasing' the team but rather greeting them. A simple test on whether or not your words are chasing the audience would be to count the number of times you have to repeat yourself on the same message. I woke up on Sunday morning believing the best communicators were world leaders and inspirational speakers. I went to bed wishing I had met Mr. Friedman and Copper 25 years ago.
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do. ~ Epictetus
Since before we were born, our parents had a plan for what they wanted us to be. After a few years of getting to know us and analyzing our behavior, they may have crafted a different plan. I was supposed to be either a crash test dummy or a lawyer. Of course there's no relation between the two but those were my mom's choices. By the time I was 12, I had already had 4 different sets of stitches, two oral surgeries, and 1 broken bone. (That helmet she made me wear around the house made sense after awhile). She figured that I would need to be an attorney in order to defend myself! Now at the ripe of age of 34, I've added 9 reconstructive surgeries, more broken bones, multiple sprains and a bad back to the fold. All of which are the results of my own accidents! Clearly she was on to something. While I sit back and laugh at my experience, there is a seriousness to the words of Epictetus. I am tired of people always telling me what they are going to be but never doing a single thing to get them there. I have friends that tell me they are going to be doctors, lawyers, accountants, and nurses, but won't even bother to take the first step of requesting a college admission application. I have friends that tell me they are going to be better leaders, fathers, mothers, and mentors, but won't do a single thing about addressing an opportunity they have to improve. It is usually the start that stops most people. A lion wakes up one day and says to himself that he is going to be king. He then proceeds to go about his business of trying to make it happen. We have a lot to learn from the lion.
My challenge to you this week is to take a first step towards accomplishing a goal you've set for yourself a long time ago. Perhaps you had a goal to be more organized. This week be non-negotiable on your promise to have one pile of papers on your desk completely addressed and removed. If your goal is to lose weight, take all the candy and junk food in your home and put it in a box. Wrap it with so much duct tape that by the time you get through it, you won't want what's in it anyway. If your goal is to be a better parent, commit to reading one book, EVERYDAY, with your child. Life is what happens while you're busy planning for it. Its time to stop planning and get on with it already!
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
Since before we were born, our parents had a plan for what they wanted us to be. After a few years of getting to know us and analyzing our behavior, they may have crafted a different plan. I was supposed to be either a crash test dummy or a lawyer. Of course there's no relation between the two but those were my mom's choices. By the time I was 12, I had already had 4 different sets of stitches, two oral surgeries, and 1 broken bone. (That helmet she made me wear around the house made sense after awhile). She figured that I would need to be an attorney in order to defend myself! Now at the ripe of age of 34, I've added 9 reconstructive surgeries, more broken bones, multiple sprains and a bad back to the fold. All of which are the results of my own accidents! Clearly she was on to something. While I sit back and laugh at my experience, there is a seriousness to the words of Epictetus. I am tired of people always telling me what they are going to be but never doing a single thing to get them there. I have friends that tell me they are going to be doctors, lawyers, accountants, and nurses, but won't even bother to take the first step of requesting a college admission application. I have friends that tell me they are going to be better leaders, fathers, mothers, and mentors, but won't do a single thing about addressing an opportunity they have to improve. It is usually the start that stops most people. A lion wakes up one day and says to himself that he is going to be king. He then proceeds to go about his business of trying to make it happen. We have a lot to learn from the lion.
My challenge to you this week is to take a first step towards accomplishing a goal you've set for yourself a long time ago. Perhaps you had a goal to be more organized. This week be non-negotiable on your promise to have one pile of papers on your desk completely addressed and removed. If your goal is to lose weight, take all the candy and junk food in your home and put it in a box. Wrap it with so much duct tape that by the time you get through it, you won't want what's in it anyway. If your goal is to be a better parent, commit to reading one book, EVERYDAY, with your child. Life is what happens while you're busy planning for it. Its time to stop planning and get on with it already!
Alonzo Kelly
http://alonzoweeklyleadershipthought.blogspot.com
What Will You Change
Few will have the greatness to bend history itself; but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of all those acts will be written the history of this generation.
~ Robert F. Kennedy
Last Wednesday I tried to buy a copy of every major newspaper to save for future conversations with my children. The significance of this years election will be one to remember. One of the more obvious points of historical significance is the diverse candidate slate we had to choose from. Men, women, young, old, black, white, mixed, divorce, adoption, religion, teen pregnancy, community college, prestige college, no college; this election had it all on one ballot! I firmly believe that every election from now on will either have a diverse candidate on the ticket or will be blindly running a losing race. While taking in the sights and sounds of our country the day after our community had spoken and elected its next President, a sudden dose of reality set in. The pundits on television, the talk show hosts on the radio, even the people in line at the grocery store, were experts on everything that was right and wrong with the outcome of the election. What lessons have we learned from events that rocked the foundation our country in the past? How many of us are now willing to accept that regardless of who won last Tuesday, we are now the next leg in this relay race called life? The election process began with each candidate holding the baton and sprinting as fast as they could, hoping to reach us first. The baton must now be passed on to us. Are we ready to take it from President-elect Obama and hold ourselves accountable for our portion of this race or will we drop the baton and wait for the next one? If we commit to focusing our time, energy, and resources to safely and efficiently handing the baton to the next person in line, our children, then Tuesdays election will indeed be historic. President Kennedy points out that the history of our generation will be written by all of us, not the gifted few.
My challenge to you this week is to have a discussion with someone else about your portion in this relay race of life. What are YOU going to commit to being responsible for to ensure the safe passage of the baton to our children. Since the beginning of time, elected officials have promised to change things so that the future of their children would be protected. One could argue that the baton has been dropped so many times over the past century that our children wouldn't recognize it as a baton at all. But, if each of us commits to being great in our own right, then there is hope that our children will finally receive a baton in tact. An event that makes history doesn't have to make the front page. Paying a bill on time 3 months in a row, doing homework with your children before they watch cartoons, or picking up a piece of fruit rather than a piece of candy can be historic events in their own right and none of which has anything do with who won last weeks election. Let this be the generation known for having the best credit, the smartest children, and the healthiest life style. These are the acts that President Kennedy spoke of then and now I challenge you to follow through.
Alonzo Kelly
The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.
~ Albert Einstein
I've often marveled at wild animal trainers and the courage they display on stage or in the arena. Surrounded by 3000 pounds of raw flesh eating power, trainers and performers display a calmness and cool that I could only imagine. I've seen 10 tigers bow to a 180 pound man in a cage. I've witnessed a bear roll over at the simple wave of a hand by a 140 pound women. On television, we can watch in awe as a man sticks his head in the open jaws of a full grown crocodile. Our rational mind tells us that with training, patience, and perseverance, we can overcome any fear and accomplish anything. Our intuition fails us sometimes as we forget we are talking about WILD ANIMALS! It takes the occasional reminder on the Animal Planet series, When Animals Attack, to keep things in perspective. I suppose Mr. Einstein could have been talking about leadership when he put this quote together. In hindsight, I bet we could all explain a bad decision we've made that was more heavily weighted on our rational mind than our intuition, affectionately referred to as our 'gut feeling'.
My challenge to you this week is to invoke your intuitive mind in a major decision you must make this week. Perhaps this decision will take place in the voting booth or maybe even the doctors office. The dictionary defines 'intuition' as a sense of something not evident or deducible; an impression. The dictionary defines 'rational' as having or exercising the ability to reason (in other words, using logic, analytic thought; intelligence). My rational mind would tell me that it is indeed possible to train a crocodile to allow me to put my head in his mouth without him snapping it off. We have data to prove this is possible and I've even witnessed it. Besides, more people die from being struck by lightening than being eaten by crocodiles. Of course my intuitive mind is the reason I've never done it. While I'm not advocating to reduce the amount of logic and data you use to make decisions, I am supporting Mr. Einstein's recommendation that we stop ignoring our gift of intuition. This gift could prove the difference between success and failure.
Alonzo Kelly
~ Albert Einstein
I've often marveled at wild animal trainers and the courage they display on stage or in the arena. Surrounded by 3000 pounds of raw flesh eating power, trainers and performers display a calmness and cool that I could only imagine. I've seen 10 tigers bow to a 180 pound man in a cage. I've witnessed a bear roll over at the simple wave of a hand by a 140 pound women. On television, we can watch in awe as a man sticks his head in the open jaws of a full grown crocodile. Our rational mind tells us that with training, patience, and perseverance, we can overcome any fear and accomplish anything. Our intuition fails us sometimes as we forget we are talking about WILD ANIMALS! It takes the occasional reminder on the Animal Planet series, When Animals Attack, to keep things in perspective. I suppose Mr. Einstein could have been talking about leadership when he put this quote together. In hindsight, I bet we could all explain a bad decision we've made that was more heavily weighted on our rational mind than our intuition, affectionately referred to as our 'gut feeling'.
My challenge to you this week is to invoke your intuitive mind in a major decision you must make this week. Perhaps this decision will take place in the voting booth or maybe even the doctors office. The dictionary defines 'intuition' as a sense of something not evident or deducible; an impression. The dictionary defines 'rational' as having or exercising the ability to reason (in other words, using logic, analytic thought; intelligence). My rational mind would tell me that it is indeed possible to train a crocodile to allow me to put my head in his mouth without him snapping it off. We have data to prove this is possible and I've even witnessed it. Besides, more people die from being struck by lightening than being eaten by crocodiles. Of course my intuitive mind is the reason I've never done it. While I'm not advocating to reduce the amount of logic and data you use to make decisions, I am supporting Mr. Einstein's recommendation that we stop ignoring our gift of intuition. This gift could prove the difference between success and failure.
Alonzo Kelly
Q: David's father had 3 sons: "Snap, Crackle, and ?"
A: David!
Q: If you were in a race and passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in?
A: 2nd Place!
I love those jokes! The main reason I love them is because they point out just how fast our mind works and how silly we look when we ignore the obvious. My wife likes to point out that I am really quick to make assumptions about what she is going to say or what she is thinking. I of course deny that until she actually does tell me what she's thinking. Those conversations usually end up with me saying something like, "Oh, I see, oops, my bad.". The same thing happens when I'm having a serious discussion with my daughter. I'll instantly assume that she knows what I'm talking about because we've had the conversation before. When she explains her behavior, I again end up saying, "Oh, I see, oops, my bad". You would think that enough of these types of conversations have happened to me that they wouldn't occur as frequently as they do. My biggest fear is that something important will happen at work and I will immediately respond with what appears to be the obvious at the time without further exploration or assessment. I'm happy to report this doesn't happen often but its probably because of the fear of getting it wrong and having to stand in front of my team saying, "Oh, I see,…..". You get the point.
My challenge to you this week is to ask one clarifying question of your peers or leader during a discussion. Practice the art of seeking clarity. Your students, classmates, clients, or fellow team members will pick up on your behavior and do the same. The result is a dialogue rich in meaningful discussion and expectations being made clear. We as leaders shouldn't wait for others to take the lead on ensuring we are able to execute on goals which are clearly defined and ready to be achieved.
Q: How many books can you put into an empty back pack?
A: 1; After that the back pack is no longer empty!
Alonzo Kelly
Objects in mirror are closer than they appear. ~ Rear view mirror warning
I bring you this quote from my weekly Weight Watchers class. Yea, I said it, I'm on Weight Watchers. For the record, the thought of a rear view mirror in weight watchers class understandably scared a few. Anyway, I couldn't help but think about what else would be in my rear view mirror if I took a careful look. Past learning experiences, failures, or let downs would be there. But previous family gatherings, uncontrollable laughter episodes, and overwhelming times of joy would also be in sight. What I love about the warning on our car door mirrors is the fact that although objects are reflected from an angle of the past, they are not all that far away. The warning to not assume that you are in the clear or have entirely lost something is a lesson about life. I saw a poster in church this past weekend that said, "If you're not sure where to find God, start at the place you last spoke". Perhaps you can't seem to figure out how to laugh again or simply relax. Maybe you're struggling with a relationship and need to reflect on why you care so deeply about the person in the first place. A quick glance in the rear view mirror will reveal that what you think is in the distant past, isn't really all that far away.
My challenge to you this week is to take a quick glance in the rear view mirror. As a leader, take a peek at some of your past successes and failures and reflect on what you've learned. Make a personal pledge to recapture the lessons from the past that guide your thinking and behavior today. If we are unwilling to reflect on our past experiences, we are destined to make poor decisions based on misguided information and blind assumptions. I don't know about you, but if the driver in front of me on the freeway insists on changing lanes without using his rear view mirrors, I have no choice but to do one of the following; either refuse to follow them and let someone else put their future in his hands, or pass him entirely and keep an eye on him while he's following me. It would be a mistake to think your staff or students aren't doing the same about you!
Alonzo Kelly
I bring you this quote from my weekly Weight Watchers class. Yea, I said it, I'm on Weight Watchers. For the record, the thought of a rear view mirror in weight watchers class understandably scared a few. Anyway, I couldn't help but think about what else would be in my rear view mirror if I took a careful look. Past learning experiences, failures, or let downs would be there. But previous family gatherings, uncontrollable laughter episodes, and overwhelming times of joy would also be in sight. What I love about the warning on our car door mirrors is the fact that although objects are reflected from an angle of the past, they are not all that far away. The warning to not assume that you are in the clear or have entirely lost something is a lesson about life. I saw a poster in church this past weekend that said, "If you're not sure where to find God, start at the place you last spoke". Perhaps you can't seem to figure out how to laugh again or simply relax. Maybe you're struggling with a relationship and need to reflect on why you care so deeply about the person in the first place. A quick glance in the rear view mirror will reveal that what you think is in the distant past, isn't really all that far away.
My challenge to you this week is to take a quick glance in the rear view mirror. As a leader, take a peek at some of your past successes and failures and reflect on what you've learned. Make a personal pledge to recapture the lessons from the past that guide your thinking and behavior today. If we are unwilling to reflect on our past experiences, we are destined to make poor decisions based on misguided information and blind assumptions. I don't know about you, but if the driver in front of me on the freeway insists on changing lanes without using his rear view mirrors, I have no choice but to do one of the following; either refuse to follow them and let someone else put their future in his hands, or pass him entirely and keep an eye on him while he's following me. It would be a mistake to think your staff or students aren't doing the same about you!
Alonzo Kelly
It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." ~ Abraham Lincoln
This past Friday, like many millions of people around the world, I tuned into the first Presidential Debate. They've been debating for over 18 months now but the media said this was the first. I listened very carefully for their plans and strategies to take our country to a better place. I kept a keen eye on body contact, body language, and signs of frustration or angst. I watched the moderator cleverly encouraging them to talk to one another rather than the audience. For 90 minutes I was able to drink from the cup of euphoria and imagine a world with peace and prosperity. I enjoyed hearing both candidates say that our systems are broken and they both had the answers to fix them. For that hour and a half, all was right with the world. Then, like being suddenly awaken from a dream, the debate was over. I was left to fend for myself in the madness of life. I realized that if I don't pay my bills on time, there's nothing either candidate could do to fix the credit crisis. If I don't properly educate myself and my children, there's nothing anyone can do to break the cycle of poverty. It became clear in all of one minute that the feelings I had during the debate shall pass if I don't make myself part of the solution. President Lincoln didn't need wise men to provide the sentence that any of us could have provided. 'This too shall pass' is a phrase that if not used appropriately can enable us to accept our current state of sad affairs. I agree that most difficult times will pass, but they'll be back if we don't demonstrate we've learned something through the experience.
My challenge to you this week is to reflect on a difficult situation that you simply let pass away without addressing it head on. Reflect on how the situation may rear its ugly head again if you continue to ignore it. Leadership requires knowing when to fight and knowing when to walk away. Walking away however is not a solution if the other party doesn't believe you are aware of what's going on. If you appear to be naïve or simply blind to the issue, both the problem and problem source will reintroduce themselves very soon. Teachers shouldn't ignore difficult students, doctors shouldn't ignore difficult patients, and managers shouldn't ignore difficult employees. "And this, too, shall pass" is a great saying when recovering from a difficult situation. Shame on us all if we dismiss the opportunity to learn from it.
Alonzo M Kelly
This past Friday, like many millions of people around the world, I tuned into the first Presidential Debate. They've been debating for over 18 months now but the media said this was the first. I listened very carefully for their plans and strategies to take our country to a better place. I kept a keen eye on body contact, body language, and signs of frustration or angst. I watched the moderator cleverly encouraging them to talk to one another rather than the audience. For 90 minutes I was able to drink from the cup of euphoria and imagine a world with peace and prosperity. I enjoyed hearing both candidates say that our systems are broken and they both had the answers to fix them. For that hour and a half, all was right with the world. Then, like being suddenly awaken from a dream, the debate was over. I was left to fend for myself in the madness of life. I realized that if I don't pay my bills on time, there's nothing either candidate could do to fix the credit crisis. If I don't properly educate myself and my children, there's nothing anyone can do to break the cycle of poverty. It became clear in all of one minute that the feelings I had during the debate shall pass if I don't make myself part of the solution. President Lincoln didn't need wise men to provide the sentence that any of us could have provided. 'This too shall pass' is a phrase that if not used appropriately can enable us to accept our current state of sad affairs. I agree that most difficult times will pass, but they'll be back if we don't demonstrate we've learned something through the experience.
My challenge to you this week is to reflect on a difficult situation that you simply let pass away without addressing it head on. Reflect on how the situation may rear its ugly head again if you continue to ignore it. Leadership requires knowing when to fight and knowing when to walk away. Walking away however is not a solution if the other party doesn't believe you are aware of what's going on. If you appear to be naïve or simply blind to the issue, both the problem and problem source will reintroduce themselves very soon. Teachers shouldn't ignore difficult students, doctors shouldn't ignore difficult patients, and managers shouldn't ignore difficult employees. "And this, too, shall pass" is a great saying when recovering from a difficult situation. Shame on us all if we dismiss the opportunity to learn from it.
Alonzo M Kelly
There is no moral precept that does not have something inconvenient about it. ~ Denis Diderot
I am a member of many organizations that are committed to community service and leadership. We stand side by side and proclaim to reject all that is wrong in our community and be models for all that is right. We profess to reject violence, discrimination, every 'ism' you can name, and infractions against humanity. In other words, we reject what my daughter describes as 'mean people' and the mean things they do. Why is it then that more often than not, it gets harder to hear this unified voice of peace and unity? I suspect that for every person who is truly trying to do the right thing, they are trumped by the scores of people who simply don't have time to join them. I'm careful not to say they don't care because I believe most people do. As this weeks quote highlights however, doing the right thing absolutely involves some element of doing the convenient thing. I've often wondered how leaders are able to use the word 'fantastic' to describe their mood EVERY DAY! After the fifth day I walk away wondering what they've avoided addressing in order to keep their harmony. While I shouldn't assume that they've avoided anything, it is something that gives me pause considering the plethora of issues we need to address in our places of business and community.
My challenge to you this week is to do one thing for someone that you know needs to be done but is inconvenient for you personally. You may choose to help an elderly person register to vote, take your neighbor grocery shopping, or give someone feedback that they absolutely need to hear. For all the things that make our leaders great, both past and present, it is their ability to do what is too inconvenient for the rest of us that stands out most. I dare say that everyone reading this email is great. What we must do this week is practice the skill of embracing inconvenience to be ready for anything that comes our way. It’s the inconvenient times, not the smooth times, that our leadership is needed most.
Alonzo Kelly
I am a member of many organizations that are committed to community service and leadership. We stand side by side and proclaim to reject all that is wrong in our community and be models for all that is right. We profess to reject violence, discrimination, every 'ism' you can name, and infractions against humanity. In other words, we reject what my daughter describes as 'mean people' and the mean things they do. Why is it then that more often than not, it gets harder to hear this unified voice of peace and unity? I suspect that for every person who is truly trying to do the right thing, they are trumped by the scores of people who simply don't have time to join them. I'm careful not to say they don't care because I believe most people do. As this weeks quote highlights however, doing the right thing absolutely involves some element of doing the convenient thing. I've often wondered how leaders are able to use the word 'fantastic' to describe their mood EVERY DAY! After the fifth day I walk away wondering what they've avoided addressing in order to keep their harmony. While I shouldn't assume that they've avoided anything, it is something that gives me pause considering the plethora of issues we need to address in our places of business and community.
My challenge to you this week is to do one thing for someone that you know needs to be done but is inconvenient for you personally. You may choose to help an elderly person register to vote, take your neighbor grocery shopping, or give someone feedback that they absolutely need to hear. For all the things that make our leaders great, both past and present, it is their ability to do what is too inconvenient for the rest of us that stands out most. I dare say that everyone reading this email is great. What we must do this week is practice the skill of embracing inconvenience to be ready for anything that comes our way. It’s the inconvenient times, not the smooth times, that our leadership is needed most.
Alonzo Kelly
"Every memorable act in the history of the world is a triumph of enthusiasm. Nothing great was ever achieved without it because it gives any challenge or any occupation, no matter how frightening or difficult, a new meaning. Without enthusiasm you are doomed to a life of mediocrity but with it you can accomplish miracles."~Og Mandino
It is often hard to face life with an enthusiastic spirit; however, it is extremely important to remember that the outcome of any situation is directly impacted by both your enthusiasm and effort which has a direct correlation with your desired results. We have all heard the saying, “You can do anything you put your mind to”. What this is truly saying is we control our destiny, our life, and our future. You can not be a victim if you refuse to be victimized and no one has to be a product of a negative environment or lower socioeconomic conditions if they choose not to be. Life is about choice and whether we choose to live with a poor attitude and little motivation or high enthusiasm and great determination is up to us.
My challenge to you this week is to live with purpose and enthusiasm and no matter how many times you stumble and fall in life always continue to get up, stand up, and be accountable for the way your life turned out. Continue to accomplish miracles in your own life as well as the lives of others who look up to you and no challenge will ever be unassailable.
It is often hard to face life with an enthusiastic spirit; however, it is extremely important to remember that the outcome of any situation is directly impacted by both your enthusiasm and effort which has a direct correlation with your desired results. We have all heard the saying, “You can do anything you put your mind to”. What this is truly saying is we control our destiny, our life, and our future. You can not be a victim if you refuse to be victimized and no one has to be a product of a negative environment or lower socioeconomic conditions if they choose not to be. Life is about choice and whether we choose to live with a poor attitude and little motivation or high enthusiasm and great determination is up to us.
My challenge to you this week is to live with purpose and enthusiasm and no matter how many times you stumble and fall in life always continue to get up, stand up, and be accountable for the way your life turned out. Continue to accomplish miracles in your own life as well as the lives of others who look up to you and no challenge will ever be unassailable.
Nkozi knight
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